Archive | April, 2021

If this were the second time I was living this day, how would I behave differently?

24 Apr
Ever feel like this?

A deep question.

We all have “one of those days.”  When things just don’t seem to go right, or they start off on an angry, scary, or annoying note.  Some of us will dwell on it all day and ruminate.  Others will push it behind us and move on with the day.  And a few of us will reflect and learn something from it.  

When coming from a stagnant mindset we tend to document our intelligence and abilities.  We want to prove ourselves right, and often don’t believe (at least at the time) that we can improve on much.  So, we think about what points could have been made to bolster our argument.  We may even get angrier and fuel our resentments.  Might even show up in a tightness in our stomachs, or clenched fists.  Symbolically closing down.  We can end up in that “fight or flight” mentality.

On the other hand, when coming from a growth mindset we believe that we are adaptable and can get smarter or do better.  We stop and pause.  We might even take a deep breath and relax our posture… loosen our shoulders.   In this frame of mind, we consider the context:  what underlying feelings might be driving MY internal escalation, and what perspectives might the OTHER person be coming from?  A growth mindset thinks.  And takes action.  And learns something (about themselves, about the situation).

So, what would you have done differently today, and what can you learn from it?