Tag Archives: selfcare

Excellence is not Perfection

15 Sep

Excellence is the result of caring more than others think is wise,

risking more than others think is safe,

dreaming more than others think is practical,

and expecting more than others think is possible.

A poster of a soaring eagle with that description has hung on my office wall for decades, and the inspirational description is by Ronnie Oldham.

Striving for Excellence is so very aspirational and it keeps us on our growth-edge.  

However, the quest for excellence does not imply the quest for perfection.  We hyper-achiever types often push ourselves to do it ALL.  To make it PERFECT.  To answer EVERYTHING.  We of course want to keep moving forward with agility and speed.  However, the cost of getting the last 10% perfect, or even more so, the cost of getting the last 1% perfect, can be very (very) high.  It can sap our energy from other activities and indulgences that delight us.

So, next time you are pushing yourself for Excellence, take a moment to pause and ask yourself whether you are actually pushing for unnecessary (and costly) Perfection.

Curious to know what you think …

Anna Minto

Founder & Consultant, Transformational Change

Executive Coach & Collaborator, You Are Possible

AMinto@trchange.com

LinkedIn.com/in/annaminto

www.annaminto.com

Just Be You!

17 Aug

Most senior leaders have spent a lot of time thinking about and acting on “leadership skills.”  It’s great that we strive for the next growth edge, and that we drive to deliver on approaches and goals set by others.

The flip side to that though is knowing that just being YOU is also vital to our happiness … and to our successes. Our lives are far richer than just our work leadership roles, particularly as prescribed by others.  Most of us are also, partners, daughters, friends, community members, and sometimes even Moms!  Never apologize for what you have to be or do, to be a whole human being.  If a work environment is not a place that you can be you, then maybe you don’t belong there.  

Life is precious.  Live yours authentically, live your dreams, and show up as the whole you 😉

Curious to know what you think …

Anna Minto

Founder & Consultant, Transformational Change

Executive Coach & Collaborator, You Are Possible

AMinto@trchange.com

LinkedIn.com/in/annaminto

www.annaminto.com

Whose Boundary is it Anyway?

31 May

We all know about “setting boundaries” … with work-life, with children, with partners and with a lot of “others.”

Underlying the work boundaries there are often 3 shapers of the lines we draw:

  • Sustainability:  how many hours, on average, we will designate to “work”
  • Predictability:  how often work plans change, and with what kind of warning
  • Flexibility: how much traditional “work hours” can flex to accommodate non-work needs

Most of us, either explicitly or intuitively are weighing and drawing those lines with our employers (who recently have often become a lot more receptive to accommodating requests if we have the courage to find our voice and ask for what will work for us.  Setting boundaries (both hard, like a concrete wall, and soft, like a strand of yellow warning tape) with employers is often the easy part.

The tricky part is setting boundaries with ourselves.  Yup, the person sitting right here with us.  We define boundaries, get buy-in with our work teams … and then choose to run into or step over them ourselves.  Sometimes it’s fear of repercussions (like promotion-track timing) … sometimes it’s just spontaneous excitement in the moment (like a super-engaging problem to finish analyzing at midnight) … and sometimes it’s just neglect (it creeps up, we ignore it, and somehow, some day, we lift our heads up and realize we’ve drifted from our own intent).  

So, the big question is:  what are YOU doing to keep YOURSELF in check?!

Curious to know what you think …

Anna Minto

Founder & CEO, Transformational Change

Executive Coach & Collaborator, You Are Possible

AMinto@trchange.com

LinkedIn.com/in/annaminto

http://www.annaminto.com

Check Out to Check In

24 Apr

Most of us have heard the advice to “check-in with yourself” … usually a suggestion about something one can do periodically and throughout the day.  Often because we’ve been frantic, juggling, busy … or simply annoying 😉

But it’s hard to really “check in” if we haven’t first “checked out” and cleared a space.  Checking out both physically, but also emotionally, and mentally.  Step back.  Pause.  Gently put your inside chatter and thought and thinking in a box.  Put it aside and check out of that time and space.  And only then …

… Find and sit in a quiet, private place.  Check-in with your whole self.  Scan your body, looking for signals.  Feel your state of being.  Really look at it and experience it.  Notice tension, temperature, heartbeat … just observe what you feel.  If your mind drifts, simply notice the thoughts and let them go, like clouds passing by.  And come back to your center and your being.When ready, note how you’ve been being (in your head, your heart, and your body). Even jot notes in your journal if that’s your practice.  Note what is familiar and what is different or familiar.  Notice what you’ve never noticed before.

Indulge your self-Ish self

23 May

For your sake AND for the sake of those around you.

Selfish: “(adjective) Concerned excessively or exclusively with oneself; seeking or concentrating on one’s own advantage, pleasure or well-being without regard for others.”  Selfish = undesirable, implying “at the expense of others.”  Like a finite number of coconuts on a dessert island … if I take one extra, someone else gets one less.   We live in a world of finite.  Finite energy, water, food, and covid vaccines.  Being selfish lives in the finite world. 

Sometimes we can convince ourselves that taking time for our own selfcare is being a bit selfish.  That making time to boost ourselves “up” robs time from others and makes them go “down.”  But selfcare lives in the infinite world … along with things like love, creativity and passion.  Selfcare is not selfish.  It’s self-ish.

Separate the word selfish into its two parts – Self-Ish:

  • Self: “(as noun) A person’s essential being that distinguishes them from others, especially considered as the object of introspection or reflexive action.”
  • Ish: (yes, it’s in the dictionary): “(adverb):  To some extent.”

Being self-ish is a good thing.  A really good thing.  It’s about caring about “me.”  Which is also good for “them.”  It lifts us up and helps us be better leaders in our personal and professional lives … and that makes the world a better place for those around us.

Have you considered scheduling an exquisite weekly self-care “hour of indulgence” with your self-ish self?  To do the things that bring you joy.  Take that luxurious bubble bath.  Sing in the shower.  Dance in the rain.  Dig your hands in the garden.  Just sit and be.  Do whatever it is that does it for you — the things you love that bring you joy. 

I welcome your thoughts … and what did you schedule?

Anna Minto

Founder & CEO, Transformational Change

AMinto@trchange.com

LinkedIn.com/in/annaminto